Okay, so here's the deal. I'm heavy. Like. Almost heavier than my highest weight ever. And when I started this blog, 120 was like, the end-all-be-all breaking point of my sanity. The moment I hit it, I would freak out and restrict and exercise and it was crazy. Now, I'm about fourteen pounds higher than that. Yeah. WTF.
So....yeah. Somewhere along the way, I've lost my motivation. I let myself go, I got fat.
So here we go, again. My BMI is 23.00 on the dot. By next Monday, I'd like to be lower than 22.4. That's very attainable.
Then by the 1st of March, I'd like to see below 21.7
By the 8th of March, I'd like to be below 21.00
By the 15th of March, I'd like to see below 20.3
By the 22nd of March, I'd like to see 19.6
By the 29th of March, my goal is to see 18.9
I think that thinking in BMIs will be a lot better for my own personal sanity, honestly. They're just nicer numbers.
In other news, my boyfriend and I fought in the early hours of this morning, and it was terrible and it resulted in both of us crying and wishing the other would text first, and of course, both of us being way too stubborn to. At one point, he was begging me not to shut him out, and it made me think that I'm probably so burned by what happened in my past relationships that I'm not giving him a chance to make mistakes without just completely shutting down. And that's not fair. So in the long run, we're tons better now.
I hope y'all had a lovely Valentine's Day.
Love,
Lee
so you are 134.
ReplyDeletewhich is one of my lower weights.
calm down, dear. it's okay. it's NOT big by any means by the way. and i don't know why you're freaking out so much... <3
i hope that you're both okay now. that fight sounds intense.
take care of yourself, dear.
-Sam Lupin
That's a pretty good idea actually, watching BMI instead of that horrible kilo number. I might steal it.
ReplyDeleteI do that too, trying to focus on BMI instead of just weight. Probably because of my height - I could weigh 190lb and still be borderline healthy so BMI is much kinder to me.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear you and your boyfriend fought. It sounds like maybe you sorted some things out though. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?
xxxx
I understand the need to do this, but I just want to provide a little sanity. I'm ashtrays being the devil's advocate, but hey, I had to learn this stuff the long hard way. Maybe you already know if but I'm gonna tennis you because you deserve a nice life not a manic one. If you restrict you'll lose weight. Makes sense. Your body also goes into starvation mode. Also makes sense. If you're not building muscle and starving it then it's going away and shrinking. So logically that means you've got more fat than muscle. Going by your bmi when you're not building muscle (which burns more calories at your resting heart rate btw) is going to make you crazy. I actually had a higher bmi at 125 than when I reached 140 and had gained over 15 lbs of muscle. I'm not trying to dumb this down to be an ass, it's just that I didn't believe my trainer. I thought seeing the pounds go up meant fat and really my intake went to building my new bod. Being healthy, confident, and strong is what is sexy. I'm 5'8" and weigh 155-160 lbs usually. I hey more attention than ever at this weight than at the lower end. Do something active that you love and love yourself because from where I'm sitting, you've got a whole lot to love!
ReplyDeletePs, typos came from my phone. Sowwy :(
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