Dickhead.

MT and I just had a huuuuuge fight. He calls because he wants to hear all about my problems, and then acts all superior and tells me to "get some sleep" FUCK. OFF.
I said some mean things, insulted his school which he hates, and then called him a dickhead and blocked him on Facebook and on my phone. I don't need his bullshit. I seriously don't. He's got this "good guy" complex where he absolutely HAS to come out looking like a good person in every situation, even if that means lying through his teeth at the last minute. FUCK. HIM.
I'm over it. Even though I sort of want to apologize, I also want him to hate himself, because he deserves it. I found this on my old blog and it's utterly perfect. I wrote it shortly after I threw him out of my life the first time, after our second breakup:

"Hey baby. That kid that you keep thinking about? He was so so bad for you. I won't even beat it around the bush, I'll just jump right into telling you the honest truth. He was a classic terrible relationship. That boy was controlling, emotionally manipulative, forceful, and borderline physically abusive.
Yeah. Stop making excuses in your head, got it? That's exactly the way he was.
He was scared to be alone. He came back to you. He might even come back again. It'll be even worse if you go back. Remember that.
You had your first cigarette today. It tasted bitter, just like you.
Remember all of those times he would push you into doing things you didn't want to? Whether it was physical stuff or not, he pushed and pushed and when you kept saying no, he'd say you didn't love him, that you wanted to, or he'd cry until you gave him his way. When you would compromise, it always had to be his way. When you were obviously, glaringly uncomfortable with something, he wouldn't notice, even though it was his JOB to notice those things and keep you safe from them. Even after he learned about what happened with her, he still pushed those things. He joked about it too, Lee. Goddamn it and you thought you loved him. How could you love that?
Remember when your leg muscles were tender and he touched them? You flinched and he asked what was wrong and when you wouldn't tell him BECAUSE IT DIDN'T MATTER, he grabbed you by the legs and squeezed them while pulling you to him. That was the first flash of fear you had. The first taste of what he could be like. Remember all those "Muay Thai" moves he'd use on you? God. Remember the little hits, the little shit he'd say to you that would just fucking eat away at you.
He. Is. Never. Going. To. Change.
He isn't even that interesting. Seriously, he's got the military, bikes and his martial arts. Yawwwwn.
Oh, but you would have stayed with him forever, wouldn't you? Because that's what he promised you. Your house and your three kids, Aspen Ann, Brooklyn Nicole and Tucker Alexander. The all night phone calls you would have. The things he helped you through. The sweet fucking lies he'd tell you.
Do you even recall what those nights were like though? Some of them ended in tears and he couldn't even tell. Some of them left you miserable, but you felt guilty for being miserable and so you ignored that emotion, making excuses for him, telling yourself YOU were the problem. Baby, that wasn't true. A boyfriend should make you happy all of the time.
Your subconscious knew you were secretly miserable and terrified and scared and insecure and it tried to tell you. You were miserable all the damn time, but the minute you talked to him everything was okay again. That wasn't because he made everything okay, it was because you weren't so desperately alone in that sea of misery THAT HE CREATED. All of those neurotic, jealous feelings you had went away completely after y'all broke up. You were okay again after y'all broke up. You only miss the attention he'd pay to you. But again, that's all just a part of his game to make you fall for him because he's afraid he'll end up alone.
He would call you names, Lee. Nutjob, freak, psycho. Yeah. You thought they were all in jest but come on. In every lie, there's a bit of truth. Lee, baby. Listen to me. He was so bad for you. Yeah, he paid attention to the little details about you. That seems sweet because he was the first one to ever do that for you but he didn't even TRY to work things out with you, he just left for another girl, AGAIN. That isn't love, sweetie. And look at you, you're so strong babygirl. You cut him out of your life, you put him in his place, you didn't give in when it counted and ohmygod that was incredible, honey! You laugh more than you used to, in my opinion. You still want to tell MT when something funny or good happens, but that urge will go away. It has to. He won't be a part of your life forever. Instead he'll just be a lesson learned.
When you do find love-like, actual love-it is going to be so beautiful. I promise. It will never make you feel the way you did with him. That's okay. That is a GOOD thing.
MT wanted sex. Sex and that is all. Not you, and everything that comes with you.
MT is the worst guy ever. There are much better guys out there.
I mean, once you've scrapped the bottom of the barrel, it's pretty hard to get lower, y'know ;)
Smile. It's such a pretty smile. And that giggle, ohmygod. It makes you, baby.
You've got a good life. It's too good to waste on some hormone-controlled player. Love lasts. Look at Mrs. C's marriage. You WILL find love like that. How could you not?"